Three Twitter’s Who’ll Make You Titter With Laughter

Last Updated on Wednesday, 22 April 2009 09:37

OK! These three accounts over on twitter.com are funny. Consistently funny; AND, aren’t peddling anything! Sure, the 12 million SEO experts who guarantee google number 1 ranking are funny, in a ‘the SEO experts finally succeeded in getting earth ranked on the Galactigoogle and they sent an asteroid this way to see if we’re a flash-in-the-pan-trending-wave and we’re one step closer to the apocalypse so I’m gonna laugh as much as possible” kinda way.

No, these three are just friggin’ funny for the sake of making you smile.

  HotAmishChick

 # Bio will show ankle for five minutes of wireless

But can I just say? The Spring collections this year are WOEFULLY short on bonnets.

Every time I meet a person who is mean when they don't have to be mean I remind myself that I have a pony and they don't.

Pfft. EVERYONE knows the dinosaurs died out because they couldn't fit on the Ark. Museum FAIL.

  Rimpelskintslut

# Bio Erm, I'm not actually selling anything. I'm still happy to take your money...just make a cheque out to Cash and mail it to Nigerian Scam HQ, c/o Gullible Greedy


If your kids annoy you, squirt them with OFF. It says right there on the can - 'For children 2 years and over. Repels for up to 4 hours'

Self-cleaning ovens, self-cleaning irons - if you were going to invent something that cleans itself, wouldn't the toilet top the list?

Yeah, it's a wine whine - you should hear my beef beef.

When I moan about the banality of reality TV people tell me "It'll grow on you". So do fungus and parasitic mites, and I despise them too.

  Irrelevantcrap

  # Bio

 

People who engage in the practice of S&M should be tied up and whipped.

I have nothing to say and I’ll say it just once.

Apparently riding on the back of the vacuum cleaner & saying 'you missed a bit ' while my wife vacuums is NOT helping.

If I was a millionaire I think I'd be a 'My glass is half empty, you're fired' kind of guy.

A 5000 piece jigsaw puzzle of a blue sky is as much fun as a misunderstanding between a rat trap and a testicle.

HAR!

I would add myself to that list, but I spend more time writing new comedy novels, retweeting something interesting and annoying my friends on twitter. So don’t follow me for humor—buy and listen to all 12 of my audionovels! That's right! I'm friggin' pimping my own work. The 12 million SEO/Marketing/Millionaire-sitting-on-my-ass twitterers aren't pimping them for me, so I have to. Ya gotta problem with it? If so, go follow Okrah.

Oh, and my work is offensive, so if yer a Puslim studying pipe-bomb 101,  or Pastor Jimbob passing the collection plate, or a missionary spreading foreign disease to hut dwellers—for your own peace of mind, hit the BACK button on your browser right now.