I'll post pics sent with your Dunkin Trilogy here.

Ah, the mighty beer shipping box! Quite clever if I might indulge in patting myself on the back.	Thoughtfully pre-inserted in a trash bag for your convenience. Just open, scrape table scraps in bag, and carry to curb!	Signed while completely batshit drunk.	Despite my best efforts—another happy customer.
Brian admired my packing skilz.	Then he paid me back for calling him a rube.	Note the restraint I exercised here.	Ya know, if I weren't drinkin' I'd be pissed off at all these pics of booze I'm not getting to drink.
Darren snagged number 3!	Over in Germany drinking good beer!	HAR! MST3K preppin' to ridicule the Dunkin film	He's plotting an ebay listing. HAR!

I forget that not all of you have a twiiter account. I post some horribly offensive crap there. My theory is, the one who pisses off everyone and gets to zero followers first—wins. HAR!Here are a few things you may not have seen:

Here is something I posted to annoy those who were angry at South Park for Having Muhaamed or whatever the fuck it's called, make a cameo.
Here's the New Summer 2010 Blockbuster Summer Movie
NEW! product from Criteslabs—The iMug
Another CritesLabs Offering
The battle of the Congressional Showe
Cover for The Hack's Newest Novel: Big'Un
Fed Up w/Airline indifference? Amazing new CritesLab breakthrough. TSAtwitToner
Amazing CritesLabs breakthrough: NicoSperm CQ

Following is a press release by a pair of pain in the ass's I enjoy interacting with: Ed Parrot and Jason Derrig. They wrote New World Orders, available free on podiobooks.com,  I like the book; so, I pimp 'em. And it's frigging .99 cents which I lose out of my pocket when I pass out in a ditch. Give 'em a try. If ya like it, just chalk it up as one more path The Hack led ya down to amusement.

MAYDAY! MAYDAY! Edward G. Talbot needs your help with his shorts.

Short stories that is. This Mayday, May 1, 2010, I'll be launching two ebook collections of short stories, for 99 cents each. A Funny Pair of Shorts contains three humorous shorts, and A Horrifying Pair Of Shorts contains three horror stories, including two never before published in any format. So head on over to www.edwardgtalbot.com and check it out.

Podcasters and bloggers can snag the one minute audio promo on the site and help spread the word. If you blog about it or play the promo in your podcast between now and the end of the day May 1st, email me and I will give you a code to get your choice of one of the ebooks for free. Then on Everyone! On May 1, y'all head on over to Amazon, Smashwords, or the Apple IBook store and get your copies in any ebook reader format. Don't have an ebook reader? No problem, at Smashwords you can get the book in any format you want, including a pdf to download to your PC. You can even read it right online.

I'm also having a Mayday contest: If you purchase one of the books anytime before or on May 1st, email me and you'll be entered into a drawing for free future work from Edward G. Talbot. If you purchase both books, you'll get two entries. Two prizes will be awarded:

    * First Prize: A free copy of our first print novel (more on that this summer) and a free copy of our next ebook, which will be a thriller novella
    * Second Prize:A free copy of our next ebook, which will be a thriller novella

Check the site for more details, including pdf and audio samples of the stories.  The first book in the collection is already available, so if you just can't wait for May 1, you can buy the book now. But check back for the second collection.  Whether you like your shorts funny or terrifying, Edward G. Talbot has got you covered, at www.edwardgtalbot.com

I've been told it's time for a new special. Here it is,  to run until I think up something new or run out of books.

UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE:

BUY THE GCC SUPERCRAPTACULAR DVD — GET A SIGNED COPY OF CRUSADE

AND DOWNLOAD LINKS FOR EVERYTHING

(except Westley Weasel which is not my book)

You get the signed, numbered DVD

You get a signed paperback copy of Crusade

You get emailed download links to:

The Dunkin the Vampire Slayer 3 audiobook

Devlin Abnormal Investigations II: Case File Cleft Behind audiobook

Devlin Abnormal Investigations II: Case File Hell Hermit — Re-Record Version audiobook

Bluetooth Bayou audiobook

No You Can't Have It audiobook

Zane Sickle Comic/Adventurer For Hire audiobook

	GET-EM-ALL!!! US BUYERS Shipped direct to yer door, a completely worthless DVD containing all manner of crap. Plus, you get an immediate download of Zane Sickle. All the audiobooks, the PDF's, the nonsense. $24.95
	GET-EM-ALL!!! INTERNATIONAL BUYERS Shipped direct to yer door, a completely worthless DVD containing all manner of crap. Plus, you get an immediate download of Zane Sickle. All the audiobooks, the PDF's, the nonsense. $30.00

Devlin Abnormal Investigations Case File: The Hell Hermit, was my very first attempt to record anything. I had a cheapass $40-dollar microphone, garageband, and a shitload of liquor. I held the mic in my hand and recorded that first Devlin book. You can actually hear me hit the mic with a cigar and slurping from my rum bottle. Hell! I had no idea, I was just having fun. The same kinda fun I have writing this crap. Drink, and weave some nonsense. Tell some jokes. String together a tale. In hindsight, as I listen to the first book, it left a bit to be desired in the quality-of-recording department. I wanted to fix that book's sound issues and found a dvd with the raw files, but they were so bad, I decided to re-record the entire book. Every sentence. Every word... without the slurping. (I still stopped to drink every paragraph, that's why this crap takes me so long, but this time I edited that part out)

It was May, 02, 2008 when episode one of Devlin hit Podiobooks.com, the chapters have been downloaded 250,000 times since then. I've recorded 12 new books and 34 chapters of the podcast in those interim 22 months. Over 130 hours of nonsense. Going on TWO-MILLION downloads of my crap—and guess what? I still don't know what I'm doing. HAR! I still use a cheap ass microphone, garageband, a homemade pop filter, but I do have a mic stand. Anyway, I re-recorded the entire book. I'm still having fun. I scream into the damn microphone. When Devlin is after a monster, I see the ugly bastard in front of me and I'm swinging the sword at it, drinking, making bad jokes, and laughing like a drunken hyena in a gopher pen.

This is the new recording. STOP!!!! Don't buy it.

 If you have bought the Dunkin Trilogy Hardcover, you get it free, PLUS it will be on the DVD inside the book. That's one of the main reasons I stayed sober long enough to get it completed. I wanted you fans who shelled out for the hardcover to have both the original and the new one on the DVD. If you have bought the hardcover, and you want to listen now, use the contact form and I'll send you links.

If you have bought the GCC SUPERCRAPTACULAR DVD, you get it FREE. Just use the contact form and let me know where to send the links.

If you have bought Westley Weasel by Kat Nove, you get it FREE. And I will send the links automatically. It's a BOGOF because I am testing the theory of recording and selling books I didn't write.

I am editing the final three chapters now. I promise both halves to be live by April 1st, 2010.

I really wanted to include this with the Dunkin Trilogy hardcover, and I am glad I managed to get it finished. You listeners are a pain in the ass, and ya interfere constantly with my drinking, and ya bug me to write faster, but somewhere, deep down, in the crusty recesses of my black heart—I love yuz. That's why I make ya read all this shit to determine if ya get it free and how to get it. Ya gotta weed through 'The Hack's' crap to ascertain yer current position vis-a-vis his newest bullshit offerings. HAR! And give me a couple days to finish tagging and zipping up the last half before asking where the hell it is. I'm drinking now. I promise to have the links sent out on the first